July 2025 

By Mālia Helelā

Forgiveness is critical to all of our healthy lives and we should all practice forgiveness to live with ourselves. – Roger Epstein

If you don’t already know Roger Epstein, you’ll feel enriched meeting him through this story. At 80 years young, Still & Moving’s long time friend has just celebrated his 80th birthday in a way only Roger could do! Roger addressed a healing conference bringing together 175 Germans whose ancestors were either Nazis or their Jewish victims. Following the program, Roger married his sweetheart from almost half a century ago!

“An 80th birthday is the beginning of freedom,” Roger says, as he shares news of his recent birthday and May nuptials. In the Jewish faith, a person who has reached this milestone has the opportunity to develop their inner self and contemplate their inner growth. Moses, who at the age of 80 led the Israelites out of Egypt, was chosen for his experience and quiet strength.

Roger beams as he shares that he and his new wife, Armi, have a lovely story that illustrates the confluence of love, forgiveness and the synchronicities of life.

Roger and Armi began their romance in 1979, when she was 22 and he 33.  They dated for a few years and moved on to separate paths, remaining good friends and running into each other from time to time.  

Serendipitously, over 40 years later in 2022, they ran into each other at Kahala Mall, rekindled their relationship, and knew right away this was the right time.

Last year in June 2024, Roger had attended a 5 day conference in Bhutan on “Reimagining Education Through the Perspective of Gross National Happiness.” Shortly after his arrival in Bhutan, he mentioned to a fellow participant that he’d been co-hosting the Hawaii Forgiveness Project for many years. The participant immediately said, “We Germans need forgiveness. We’re still suffering from shame and guilt 80 years after the end of WWII.”  

And coincidentally, Roger was born the day of Germany’s surrender on May 8, 1945.

So, with this as background, Roger and Armi created a wonderful adventure.  They first went to Washington, DC, where Roger’s daughters threw a family party for his 80th birthday.  

From there, they flew to Frankfurt, Germany for a 4 day conference on “Ancestral Healing”, led by Chuck Spezzano (who lives in windward Oahu and does wonderful forgiveness and healing programs around the world), where the first day program on May 8 ended at the exact time the Armistice was signed in 1945. Of the 175 people attending the conference in person or on zoom, 90% either had Nazi or Nazi victim ancestors. Roger spoke on Forgiveness that day.

Chuck married Roger and Armi after the program, and they then drove from Frankfurt to Bellagio, Lake Como, Italy, where they enjoyed a 5 day honeymoon, where they feasted on the food, drinks, and incredible beauty of Lake Como, hiking to remote monasteries and, of course, appreciating the incredible blessing of reengaging true love at ages 80 and 69.

We at Still & Moving Center are grateful to Roger for the perspective and compassion that he has generously shared with us. Roger took note of our humble yet heartfelt beginning in 2011. In 2012, he made sure that Still & Moving Center got to participate in the huge Voyage of Aloha community event that he produced in Honolulu. On numerous occasions he featured Renée Tillotson and myself as presenters at Forgiveness project events around O’ahu. 

Roger holds and shares the legacy of world mythologist Joseph Campbell and his foundation. For several years before and after Jean Erdman Campbell’s 100th birthday in 2016, Roger arranged for us to celebrate her and her husband at Still & Moving Center. https://stillandmovingcenter.com/event/100th-year-celebration-of-a-moving-life-jean-erdman-campbell/

In February of 2014 Roger helped us to organize with Joseph and Jean Campbell’s dear friend Chungliang Al Huang the Tao of Aloha program, consisting of:

• Tai Ji meets Lua with Kumu Ramsay Taum 
• Tai Ji meets Hula with Kumu Mālia Helelā
• Tai Ji meets Yoga with Professor Ramdas Lamb.

As a several times contributor to our Gems From the Wisdom Traditions conversation circle, Roger has shared his mana’o (wisdom) on serving humanity. Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbWYBX9fC9Y

So, if you haven’t quite met Roger yet, please introduce yourself the next time you get a glimpse of him. His sweet vivaciousness is quite contagious, and you’ll shed a few years just sharing an aloha moment with Roger!